How Do Affirmations Work + an Easy Exercise to Get Started.

 

When I'm caught in resistance - when I'm deep in the churn of anxiety, self-doubt, or numbness - the idea that a few words could fix anything can feel... ridiculous.

That’s the irony of their power.

Affirmations.

So simple, so small, that they’re easy to dismiss.

But how we feel is always the result of a belief -

a perspective or practised thought that denies us what we want.

And when we’re trying to feel better, what do we usually reach for?

A grand gesture:

• A new morning routine
• A quick fix
• A 21-day challenge
• Better sleep
• More water
• Less caffeine

But the problem usually isn’t out there. It’s within us.

It’s in our thoughts about where we are and who we are.

Whether we’re ahead or behind. Whether we’re enough. Whether we’re safe.

So naturally, if the problem is within - the healing must be too.

That’s why we return to the power of affirmations. Not as a bandage. Not as a positive-thinking trick.

But as an act of conscious interruption - a moment where we meet ourselves deliberately, in the middle of the spiral. Sometimes, it’s as simple as taking three minutes…and a quiet decision: 

I want to move toward relief.

Why and How Affirmations Work 

The brain is always listening.

Every thought we repeat gets grooved a little deeper, until - in most cases - it becomes a belief.

What you say repeatedly becomes what you expect.

And what you expect, you begin to perceive — or feel, at the least.

In other words:  You’re already using affirmations.

They just might not be the kind you want.

“I can’t do this.”

“I always ruin it.”

“This is never going to change.”

We repeat these things not because they’re true, but because they’re familiar. Practised. Grooved. Believed. 

But, affirmations aren't about pretending. They're about pattern-breaking.

They help redirect your energy, break away from the practised path — from spiralling into suffering, to softening into presence.

They don’t solve everything, and certainly not in a blink. But they do something most tools don’t: They meet you at the point of creation — the thought level — and offer a new direction. When we break a thought pattern, when we shift our mind to consider something new, we start to see the world around us in a new light.

The Feel-Better Method

3 Steps. 3 Minutes. A shift that begins within.

You don’t need incense or moonlight.

Just a breath, a moment, and a willingness.

Here’s how it works:

Step 1: Pause + Breathe (60 sec)

Just stop.

Close your eyes, if it helps.

Notice your body. Feel your breath.

Let everything be exactly as it is - just for a moment.

You don’t have to fix the feeling.

But you do need to meet it.

This is where the shift begins: presence without pressure.

Step 2: Choose Your Power Phrase (60 sec)

Pick a phrase that speaks to where you are.

Not where you think you should be.

Some of our favourites:

• It’s safe to take a step back, pause and breathe.
• I don’t have to figure it all out right now.
• Nothing serious is happening here.
• I can choose a better-feeling thought, from where I am.

It’s not about tricking yourself into joy.

It’s about interrupting the old pattern of thought, and the momentum of suffering — gently, and intentionally.

(And if you need help choosing, the Emotions I Love to Feel Affirmation Cards were made for this exact moment.)

Step 3: Repeat With Intention (60 sec)

Whisper it.

Speak it.

Hold it in your mind like a thread.

Say it slowly. Let it land.

You’re not commanding the universe — you’re offering yourself a different path.

And that moment — where your breath gets deeper, your shoulders drop just a little,

or your jaw unclenches. That’s the shift. That's the healing.

Not everything in reality needs to change for you to feel better, or live a good life. 

When to Use It

Use this method whenever you notice yourself slipping into:

• Overwhelm
• Self-criticism
• Anxiety
• Emotional numbness
• Or simply that subtle “off” feeling

There’s no wrong time to use affirmations, all you need is the idea, your willingness, and 3 minutes.

What Feeling Better Actually Means

It doesn’t mean perfect.

It doesn’t mean productive.

It doesn’t mean pretending.

It means presence.

It means softness.

It means choosing to interrupt the noise and return to yourself - gently, bravely, and on purpose.

Three minutes. One phrase. One small shift.

That’s the feel-better method.

And if you ever forget?

That’s okay.

The door back to yourself is always open.

Sometimes, all it takes… is a better-feeling thought.

Thanks for reading,

James, The Feel Good Guys.